The Proposal

Just after the proposal, overlooking Boulder, Colorado

The story of the proposal begins several weeks beforehand, when Nil began expressing her concerns about the emphasis on her birthday celebration (June 7). She stressed the fact that she wanted this birthday to be a huge surprise because it was our first together and her last few birthdays had not been that much fun.

When I decided to propose, many thoughts passed through my head about how and when to do it. As Nil continued to focus on her birthday, it became more and more clear that this would be a birthday surprise beyond all expectations. So the planning began. As any girlfriend does, Nil casually passed by jewelry stores and showed me her preferences. As any boyfriend does, I appeared to pay little attention to her desires. Secretly, each suggestion and preference was considered and applied to the ring that was being constructed in my mind.

The weekend before her birthday, we visited with my parents. My brother, a sous-chef, had offered to prepare a meal for the four of us at his restaurant, the Peppertree. While we were visiting at my parent's house, my dad realized he needed to run to the store. My mom suggested that Nil go with him on this errand. As soon as they left, my mom and I left for the diamond broker. We spent about an hour looking at diamonds. Ultimately, I selected a center diamond and two, matching side diamonds, along with an appropriate setting. On the way back, to setup the excuse, we stopped at Petsmart. I purchased a few items for our dog, Cadbury. When we returned home, there was a fuss made about the amount of time I can spend browsing at Petsmart. We continued on with the evening with a spectacular dinner at the Peppertree and drinks at the Golden Bee. Nil experienced her first yard of beer. My brother and his girlfriend joined us and we had a wonderful evening.

The next day, after the girls went shopping and the boys played golf, Nil and I headed back to Lafayette. Nil did not seem to have a clue about my shopping trip. On Monday, I looked at diamonds and rings elsewhere, but none compared. Tuesday I arranged to purchase the ring I had selected over the weekend. The purchase process was fairly complex. My credit card had to be physically swiped at the store and the receipt had to be signed. Since the store was in Colorado Springs, this became a cumbersome process. Tuesday I sent my card to the store via Federal Express. Wednesday it was received and processed. Thursday the ring and receipt were sent back, and Friday all was received - the tension and worry had passed.

On Friday afternoon, the day of the proposal, I spoke with my best friend Scott several times about all aspects of the evening. He made several great suggestions that I decided to use. He also directed me to call and arrange everything ahead of time. I have to listen to my best friend, so I followed his instructions. I called the Flagstaff House Restaurant to orchestrate the proposal. The strategy was to have the ring presented on the dessert tray, along with the other desserts. The hostess agreed to help arrange everything once we arrived at the restaurant.

The next call was to Nil's father, Mr. Saltuk, in Rhode Island. When he answered, I asked if he had heard Nil's label for her birthday, "The Birthday Weekend Extravaganza" (complete with arm flair). He hadn't heard this, but laughed at the title. We talked for a little bit, and then I told him about my plans for the evening. "Mr. Saltuk, tonight I plan to take Nil to the Flagstaff House Restaurant for her birthday. It is a gourmet restaurant overlooking Boulder and she has mentioned several times that she would love to eat there. At the end of dinner, I would like to give her a ring and ask her to be my wife. But before I do, I would like to have your permission to do so." He replied, "It would be an honor. We already think of you as part of this family." We continued to talk, while he called Mrs. Saltuk to the phone. He said she wanted to say something to me as well. She said, "It's wonderful, the two of you make a terrific couple." We continued to talk and she concluded with the statement, "We're all crying here." Apparently, Mr. and Mrs. Saltuk and Nil's sister, Zeynep, were all there with tears of joy. After the calls had been made, I was able to relax a bit. I took the time to admire the ring and think that this evening, it would be on the finger of the woman with whom I'd spend the rest of my life; the woman I loved.

It was finally time to get myself ready. I showered, dressed and gathered everything I needed. To this point, I had not been able to find a small gift to give Nil, before presenting the ring, to ensure her complete surprise. I left my house early to stop by a few places. I thought my best bet for a gift, gift bag, and tissue paper would be Target. I stopped and found a small stuffed dog. I looked for a German Shepard, to setup a story, but could not find one so I got a Rottweiler instead. I picked up a bag and some tissue and packed it in the parking lot. When I arrived at Nil's apartment, she looked gorgeous! We walked to my car and I started to drive. I had planned to drive in circles, slowly approaching Boulder, but I had spent too much time searching for the stuffed dog. As we drove to Boulder, I continued to make references to different types of events to keep her confused. As we approached the Flagstaff House Restaurant, she indicated she had a pretty good idea where we were going. At that point, I started to look for a turn and made comments that I thought we had passed it. These comments made her question whether she was right. Finally, we arrived at the Flagstaff House. Nil was so surprised and happy with my plans for her birthday surprise, but she still didn't suspect the real surprise.

Once we entered the restaurant, we were taken immediately to a table with a spectacular view over Boulder. At that point, I told Nil that I have forgotten to bring in her gift. Though she said it wasn't a big deal, I said I wanted to get it so she could open it at dinner. As I approached the foyer, the hostess asked if anything was wrong. I let her know that I had left a gift bag in the car. She offered to get it. I told her that the ring box was in the bag and she was to take this out before bringing the bag to the table. She took the valet check and went to get it. A few minutes later, our waiter brought the bag to the table, sans ring box. The dinner, a wonderful five-course meal, was accompanied by great conversation. Hawks gave us a show as they flew overhead and circled their prey. After the entrée, I gave her a card and the gift bag. She opened the card and started to cry. The card tried to identify the thing I loved most about her. After four pages, it covered everything. She then opened the bag to find the stuffed dog. The stuffed dog was intended to disappoint her. The reason was going to be, "Since I spent so much on dinner, I couldn't afford to get you anything more." Instead of being disappointed, she was happy, so my reasoning changed to, "I know you miss Guinness so I tried to find a German Shepard, but this is the closest I found." While she was thanking me for the thought, the waiter approached from behind her. I gave a quick nod, which Nil missed, and he set a bowl in front of her. In the bowl, laid on a well-folded napkin, was the ring box. The expression on her face changed from one of mild happiness to a combination of exhilaration, shock, and disbelief. She looked down to the box and back up at me, back to the box and back to me, tears rolling down her face. She saw the tears on my face and smiled. She continued to shift her gaze between me the box in front of her for several minutes. Finally, I asked if she was going to open it. "No!" she replied quickly.

A little confused, I told her she should open it. She looked at me, back to the box, and back at me again. Finally, she realized I wasn't going to say or do anything until she opened the box. She reached down, picked up the box, and held it in front of her. She gave me one final look to make sure I wasn't going to do anything, and then she opened it. Again, a look of confusion crossed her face. Inside the box was a small slip of paper… a Chinese fortune. She pulled it out and read, "You are offered the dream of a lifetime. Say yes!" Immediately she recognized the fortune from the night we ordered Chinese a few weeks earlier. At that point, I moved to the side of the table, bent down on one knee, held the ring in my hand and said, "I've loved everything we've had these past months; everything we've had tonight; everything we'll have in the future. Would you do me the honor of becoming my wife?" Nil immediately embraced me. We kissed for several minutes. When we finally let go of each other, I remembered a story I had read. To ensure that I didn't make the same mistake, I asked one more question, "Is that a yes?". "Of course." she replied. Our coffee and raspberry soufflé was delivered and we finished our meal in near solitude, only concerned with each other. It wasn't until we left the restaurant that we even thought of a picture. We stopped on the way down and took a picture from the Flagstaff overlook. We were engaged. So, when you see her, ask to see the ring from Petsmart.